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Is your adoptive family frequently in turmoil?
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Are you worried sick as a parent, by your adopted teen’s problems, such as:
Failing or bad grades in school, despite their ability 
Engaging in risky behaviors, such as substance use,
premarital sex
Truancy
Extreme anger
Running away
Choosing friends who are a bad influence?
Does your adopted child experience:
School problems
Neediness, insecurity, fears
Difficulty following family rules
Hoarding food or other eating problems
Impulsiveness
Temper tantrums
Problems bonding with your family
Difficulty accepting comfort when upset?
Does your adopted child or teen have significant challenges with:
Depression
Low self-esteem
Feeling abandoned
Social isolation or apathy
Feeling fearful about the future much of the time
Feelings of grief or sadness that don’t seem to lessen,
no matter what you or others do to offer comfort?
As an adult who was adopted as a child, do you feel:
Somehow different or not the same as others in your family group?
Feelings of depression, grief, fears or insecurity that linger in the background
of your life, even though outwardly, you may appear to be “fine” to others?
Easily upset or angered over little things and wonder why?
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As a parent of adopted children,
do you frequently feel exhausted
from all the stress and turmoil that never seems to end?
Do you sometimes feel like you are at the end of your rope?
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If you relate to these challenges and issues that children, teens and adults in adoptive families go through, then you or your children may be experiencing the after-effects of adoption-related trauma.
Adoption is a wonderful blessing for children and families - a wonderful blessing born out of wounds.
Those wounds don’t go away automatically, once a child has been placed in your loving home, or once your adoption has been finalized. They linger inside the adopted child or teen, and they can show up in all the ways described above, and often more!
Adoption-related trauma wounds affect your child or teen, you and everyone else in your family. To one degree or another, everyone in your family is touched by these wounds. No wonder it may sometimes feel like the turmoil is all encompassing, and never ends.
No wonder you may be feeling exhausted or at the end of your rope too much of the time.
Now there is hope and healing for the wounds of adoption
You and your children don’t have to suffer with the emotional pain, and family turmoil of adoption any longer. You and your children can now release the impact and lingering effects of a painful birth experience or early childhood. Your family can become happier, and more peaceful. Your family relationships can become easier.
Your adopted children and teens can come to peace within themselves, as they release and heal their painful inner wounds and memories.
You can release the exhaustion, worry and turmoil you feel as a parent. Together, you and your children can create a new foundation for personal happiness, feelings of security and self-worth, more success in school, in family relationships, and for creating healthy, uplifting friendships. In so doing, you and your children will create a new beginning for success in all areas of their lives.
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“Our family has tried everything we could find to help our adopted kids. Some  things help a little, but nothing we have found so far really makes much of a difference."
I understand your frustration and concern. It can feel discouraging and disheartening when you have sought out all kinds of help, and your child or teen is still feeling so much pain, having so much difficulty, and your family is still experiencing so many struggles.
Many of my adoptive family clients have felt the same when they started working with me. They often feel like they are at the end of their ropes! As they begin their programs of Spiritual Energetic Healing™, or Healing Parenting™ coaching, my clients quickly begin to release the pent up hurt, pain, anger, disappointment and feelings of being cheated from the life they dreamed of. What’s more, through their appointments, clients release and heal the root causes and underlying reasons for their adoption wounds.
Help for Children & Teens
Steven's Story
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Steven* was 14 when his parents contacted me to help their son. He was failing in school, didn’t keep promises at home or at school, lied, felt chronically depressed and had starting hanging out with new friends whom his parents thought were a bad influence.
As Steven and I worked together, he was able to heal the grief he had felt since early childhood due to moving away from his birth country, and losing all contact with his biological family.
He was able to more easily accept and trust his adoptive parent’s love, and came to feel that he belongs in his adoptive family.
His grades improved, and after some challenging learning experiences, Steven learned the value of being honest, even in difficult situations. Steven uncovered an inner anchor for his sense of identity, and with that his self-confidence and self-worth improved. With time, he changed his group of friends, and his parents no longer worry about their influence on him.
Steven’s mom and dad learned new effective ways to release their own stress, worry and exhaustion, support one another, and new strength-based, asset-building means to support Steven in his own healing journey. They came to see the inner truth in Steven that he had discovered about himself, and so began to view their son in a new light, which supports his healing and growth.
Today, Steven has successfully completed high school, and is nearing graduation from a junior college. He is successfully working, and preparing to transfer to a regional four-year university, where he plans to complete a degree in graphic design. He has been seriously dating his girlfriend for over a year, and they are considering getting married.
*Names & other details changed for privacy.
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As we work together, children and teens are healed from the painful experiences of their births and early childhoods. Their painful feelings of depression, grief and loss, and all those behaviors they use to help themselves cope, can be relieved, and in many cases, healed. As they progress through their programs, adopted children and teens learn to trust, believe that they belong and that the world is now a safe place, because they feel safe and have a feeling of belonging inside of themselves, often for the very first time.
Adopted teens discover within themselves the intrinsic truth of who they are, and find a new perspective on their life experiences – a perspective that brings them peace and helps them find a new source of personal identity. They discover strengths and resources within themselves, that many never dreamed they had.
In discovering their inner truth, they also connect with an inner source of self-worth and self-confidence. With more self-worth, other areas of their lives change too, including increased self-confidence, improved relationships with other family members, improved school performance, self-motivation, and choosing new, healthier friendships.
Healing Parenting Coaching™ ~
Solutions & Resources for Adoptive Parents
Healing Parenting™ Coaching is the other half of Healing Adoption Wounds. With Healing Parenting™ Coaching, adoptive parents not only learn about the cutting-edge science of the neurobiology of trauma, and how trauma affects children's growth and development, ability to trust, and form attachments, but what to do in daily experiences with their children, to help them step out of adoption-trauma-induced fear, anxiety, anger, overwhelm, need to control, insecurity, and other challenges of adopted children and teens.
With Healing Parenting™ Coaching, you will learn how to help your children "step their emotions down", so they are not so powerful and overwhelming. You will learn how to help your children to self-soothe, according to their own inner healing resources, and what is soothing to them!
You will learn how to support your children to disengage from repetitive painful patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving, and how to make new choices that lead to greater happiness, self-empowerment and effectiveness for your kids, and more peace within your family. You will learn how to have spontaneous Healing Conversations™ with your children that truly assist in healing their inner wounds, in the daily experiences of their lives.
Healing Parenting™ Coaching also teaches parents self-care techniques to use YOURSELF, to alleviate your OWN stress from parenting adopted children!
Many parents find that as they gain mastery of Healing Parenting™ principles and skills, and begin consistently using them with their children, the differences in their family life are remarkable. Others have commented on those differences for many families. Many Healing Parenting™ parents find these principles and skills work so well, that they begin using them with all of their children - and foster a family culture of optimal well-being for all members.
“Wow! This is exciting! Why haven’t I heard of this before now?”
Many of the methods I use in Spiritual Energetic Healing™ and Healing Parenting™ Coaching have been around for over thirty years. Others are cutting-edge. They are part of an exciting and rapidly growing newer school of holistic healing that together is termed “Energy Healing”. From beginning in the holistic arena, these methods are quickly becoming better known and used by practitioners in many fields.
Energy healing methods are also gaining recognition and more wide-spread use for their benefit in large scale disaster relief, such as hurricanes, floods, or man-made disasters, such as school shootings. This is because they are very effective, very quickly.
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“What’s an expert in Relationship healing doing, also specializing in adoption?”
The connection is in the fact that, in their essence, adoption wounds are wounds in relationships, specifically trauma-initiated relationship wounds. I have been a relationship healing specialist for over twenty years. The most common theme for those who seek out my help is trauma of one sort or another. Healing trauma is one of my greatest specialties and deepest passions.
My journey of healing my own adoption experience was what led me originally to the methods I use in Spiritual Energetic Healing™, so I know from my own life the transformative potential and power they offer. My life and family relationships are now gratefully and happily healed. Because of this, I have a particularly tender spot for assisting other adoptive families and adoptees, as I have done for over sixteen years.
At the heart of Spiritual Energetic Healing™ and Healing Parenting™ Coaching is my life-long innate gift as a Spiritual Healing Intuitive. With this Divinely-given gift, I am enabled to discern the root causes for clients' trauma wounds, and how they have been affected them. This is combined with my expertise in specialized methods that are:
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Based on our understanding of trauma and
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what happens in a person's brain and body/mind when she or he experiences trauma
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understands how this diverts and interrupts normal growth and development, including
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Impairing the ability to form secure attachments
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Creating a shaky personal foundation, interrupting forming a stable sense of self
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Negatively affects learning
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Disrupts the ability to have healthy, functional relationships
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Frequently robs adoptees of being able to live a happy, fulfilling life.
Through Spiritual Energetic Healing™ and Healing Parenting™, adoption-related trauma wounds can be released and healed. Once that is accomplished, many of the challenges adoptees experience can also be healed or greatly reduced.
During my professional career, I have worked for public and private adoption agencies in Georgia and Colorado, as an Adoption Specialist or Birth-parent Counselor and Program Coordinator. I previously conducted home studies for many years, including the newer Structured Analysis and Family Evaluation (SAFE) home study process.
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“We adopted our daughter as a teenager, five years ago. You have been a lifesaver for her!
She is now thriving. Working with you assisted her to bond with our family, which she so deeply wanted. You have made the difference for our daughter in healing abandonment, neglect, illegitimacy, low self-esteem and much, much more.
She is a lovely young woman, with a bright future. I don’t think I could have made it through the first three years as her mother without your help – for me too!”
LT Boulder, CO
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My enthusiasm for working with adoptive families and adoptees lies in sharing the hope and healing I have found, for your adoption wounds. I know countless others who have experienced similar healing.
Now, so can you and your family.
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Are you ready
to find hope and healing
for your family’s adoption wounds?
I offer a limited number of low-cost Initial Consultations, including an insightful Life Experiences self-assessment and brief laser coaching, for adoptive parents, and teen and adult adoptees who are serious about healing their adoption wounds, and creating more peace and happiness in their relationships and families.
Learn more about an
Initial Consultation,
and how to schedule yours.
From my office in east Texas, I work with clients from through-out the state and country, in person as well as via phone sessions.
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Warmly,
Debra
Debra Gordy, MS MRET
Transformational Life and Relationship Coach, Healing Parenting™ Coach
Spiritual Healing Intuitive
Developer of Spiritual Energetic Healing™
Author of the forth-coming book, Cinderella Wisdom: A Woman's Journey of Spiritual Healing to Her Dream Marriage
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Unveiling the Secrets to Flourishing in Life and Love
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No part of this website may be copied by any means
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